Survivor of sexual assault finds therapy in writing novels
By Melanie Threlkeld McConnell
Maddie O'Shine
Maddie O鈥橲hine was about 9 years old when she was first sexually assaulted and 11 when it finally ended. Her post traumatic stress syndrome continues to this day.
Now 19 and a freshman at 糖心Vlog University, O鈥橲hine, a pseudonym, has written a modern fantasy, 鈥淩everie,鈥� that looks at sexual assault through the eyes of a teenage boy 鈥� O鈥橲hine is female 鈥� set in 2047 in a fictional country. She started the book when she was 16 and finished it last fall. 鈥淚鈥檝e been writing since I was 11. This was actually the coping mechanism I developed from my childhood sexual assault. It turned from coping mechanism, where I was jumping into worlds that had nothing to do with our world, into a form of art I鈥檓 passionate about and I want to pursue as a career,鈥� she said.
In addition to sexual assault, the book talks about homophobia 鈥� O鈥橲hine is pansexual 鈥� but does not portray traumatic events. 鈥淚 know firsthand how horrible reading that can be,鈥� she said. 鈥淏ut the topics come from experiences in my own life.鈥�
The book, which O鈥橲hine self-published and is available on , follows Matthew, an 18-year-old boy who was kidnapped at age15 by a sex trafficking ring and held captive for two years before escaping. O鈥橲hine wanted to show how he comes to terms with what he鈥檚 been through, how he deals with his PTSD, 鈥渨hich never fully goes away,鈥� she said, and how he starts to grow and recover from his experience. 鈥淭he idea is that he cannot heal on his own, but no one else can do it for him,鈥� she said.
Why a male lead instead of a female? 鈥淚 wanted 鈥淩everie鈥� to be something that most people could relate to. The majority of sexual assault survivors are female. I wanted them to read 鈥淩everie鈥� but not compete with this female character who鈥檚 been through sexual assault. I didn鈥檛 want them to go, 鈥極h well, my PTSD isn鈥檛 as bad as hers, so I must be faking.鈥� If it鈥檚 a male character, I think they鈥檇 have an easier time connecting.鈥�
While the book is considered modern fantasy, there are also elements of magic that help with his healing. 鈥淭hat鈥檚 because I wanted the magic of nature to correlate with his growth, there鈥檚 growth in nature and recovery in nature. It鈥檚 a big piece of symbolism,鈥� she said.
Writing the book has helped O鈥橲hine deal with her own trauma, she said, and the numbers prove it. While in therapy as a teenager, O鈥橲hine was administered a PTSD test, with a scale of 1 to 80. 鈥淎nything over 40 is severe PTSD. At 16, I scored a 72. I took it last year, about two years after I started 鈥淩everie,鈥� and I scored a 57. It鈥檚 quite a big jump.鈥�
O鈥橲hine, from Raleigh, is majoring in hospitality and tourism, a change this semester from psychology, and minoring in creative writing. 鈥淢y intention was to be a PTSD therapist, but I have much more passion for travel. I want to work for Disney because my best memories, the happiest moments of my life are at Disney and I want to help other people get there, get that happiness.鈥�
With April being Sexual Assault Awareness month, O鈥橲hine said she鈥檚 had a few moments that caused her panic, proof to her that PTSD still hovers close. 鈥淎 few boys on TikTok had declared April 24 national rape day and said it was a day to carry out acts of rape and assault. Obviously, this is horrible, and it terrified many women in the U.S.,鈥� she said.
But she鈥檚 also a believer in healing from trauma and she hopes her book will help others. She wants other victims of sexual assault to know that things get better. 鈥淭here is always a way to recover and it鈥檚 not the end of the world. Your life is not over because of what you鈥檝e been through,鈥� she said.
In fact, O鈥橲hine is working on a second book about sexual assault titled 鈥淎ctions Rarely Lie.鈥� It also will be self-published and should be available in August, also through Amazon. Learn more about her journey on Instagram at .
